5 Steps To Develop Self - Worth

You may be feeling insecure, unstable, or have a constant sense of underlying anxiety that taints everything as if it is poison.

Lack of self - worth is like being a tree without roots.

No matter where you go or what you do, you feel insubstantial and demoralised.

While others appear to be healthy and confident, and you're like a plant that has all of its leaves ripped off. You may try and put a mask on and put up a facade to fool others, but deep down, you know it is all a lie.

Do you feel unworthy of happiness, love, and success?

If you struggle with feeling good about yourself, you are not the only one. I have been there, the majority of us have, and that is not a nice way to live. I will be sharing with you the tips I used to boost my self - worth.

What is Self - Worth?

Self - Worth means believing that you're fundamentally worthy as a person. It is often used alongside words such as self - respect and self - esteem but self - worth is much more rudimentary. When we lack self - worth, an innate sense of dignity is missing.

There is a big difference between self - worth and self - esteem.

Although these two words are synonymous, they're not the same. There's a hierarchy of importance here. Self - worth comes before self - esteem. Self - worth is the foundation - it's like the roots and self - esteem is like the branches.

Without self - worth, self - esteem is shallow and unstable.

Can you imagine what a tree would look like without its roots? Yes, that is right: a tree would be reduced to a pitiful pile of leaves an branches. That is what happens when we don't have the foundation of self - worth.

Self - worth is believing that you're fundamentally worthy, whereas self - esteem is feeling good or confident about yourself.

Can you have self - esteem without self - worth? Yes, look at narcissists. They exude self - esteem or self - confidence so much that it is toxic to other people. There is an issue here that they don't possess self - worth. Their narcissism is a mask or defense mechanism against the tremendous feelings of unworthiness that they carry inside.

Five Tips For Developing Self - Worth

Rewrite Your Core Beliefs Through A Mantra

Mantras are statements that are repeated over and over again. In the West, mantras are often referred to as "affirmations."

To discover your core beliefs, I encourage you to pay attention to the little voice in your head. What does it chatter about during the day? What fears emerge? Eventually, you'll notice specific themes and insecurities arising.

Once you have pinpointed the core beliefs you have about yourself (e.g., I always hurt people, I deserve to be punished, I am boring), you can then counteract them through a mantra.

Try choosing or creating a mantra that is the exact opposite of the core wound. For example, if you have discovered that one of your core beliefs is "I am worthless," you may like to deprogram that belief and replace it with "I am worthy, and I love who I am."

At first, you will feel skeptical and find it cheesy, but that is only because your mind has been conditioned to believe the opposite. After a while, you'll start to see significant changes that arise in your thinking behaviours, patterns, and feelings.

Alternatively, you could search for some affirmations on the internet or a self - help book. Stick with the mantras that you resonate with the most and repeat every day. (want to find out how to use affirmations properly? Click here).

Try to practice every day for at least ten minutes (ideally during meditation practice - but even better throughout the day). Try to infuse your mantra with as much heartfelt sincerity as possible because the unconscious mind is where all the magic happens.  

Reclaim What Has Been Repressed (Your Power)

How can we possibly feel good or worthy when we're living a version of ourselves that is not real or authentic?

Our interactions, our feelings about ourselves; indeed, our very lives will always feel false when we are hiding parts of ourselves.

To reclaim what you have repressed, you'll need to practice inner child work and shadow work. Both of these forms of inner work are ideal ways to dig up what has been repressed and shut away within you.

One of the most powerful methods I've found practising both the inner child and shadow work is something known as mirror work. I recommend learning how to do mirror work so that you can get started on reclaiming your power and authenticity.

Replace People-Pleasing With Self - Care

It is impossible just to stop people-pleasing as that pattern, most likely, has been ingrained into you over a very long period of time.

It is possible to slowly channel the energy to a new means such as self-care. That might seem selfish, and it may be, but the reality is that you're choosing to refuel yourself and learn how to care for yourself.

Once you know how to take care of yourself, you can then genuinely care for others. The care you share with others won't be tainted by unconscious motives such as the need to be validated; instead, it will be fuelled by the genuine desire to help others.


Journaling is a wonderful world to be a part of; it is refreshing. Not only will this make you feel better emotionally, but it will also allow you to gain mental clarity surrounding your low self-worth.

I recommend that you journal for a minimum of five minutes every single day. You can always write about different things such as what happened during your day, how did the day make you feel and whether you noticed anything new about yourself.

To explore self-worth while journaling, you can try and answer the following:

  • What is something no one could take from me?

  • What kind of person do others expect me to be?

  • Who am I, and who am I not?

  • What false ideas have I been taught about myself?

  • If I lost everything in my life, what would I have that would still be of value?

Once you have answered these questions, you may want to revisit it in the future to see if anything has changed. If anything, you will get an exciting glimpse into your mind and thought process after journaling about these questions.

Work With An Archetype

Archetypes are universal patterns or types of energy - they have existed since the dawn of time.

We can all see archetypes present in all cultures of the world, such as:

  • The Orphan

  • The Caregiver

  • The Seeker

  • The Lover

  • The Destroyer

  • The Creator

  • The Warrior

  • The Magician

  • The Ruler

  • The Mother

  • The Father

  • The Saint

  • The Joker

Each one of us possesses numerous archetypes within our personality structures. Sometimes certain archetypes within us are missing, but why is that? It is usually because they have been repressed during our childhood because there were deemed as "bad" or "inappropriate" by our parents.

In the case of low self-worth, the dominant archetypes that are missing within us are the Rebel, King, Queen, and Boss.

I would recommend searching for figures in history who you admire that match any one of the above archetypes. By consciously working to bring in the energy of an archetype, you lack is related to your self - worth. You will find the power you need to break through the negative core wounds within you.

Self-Worth Is An Inside Job

Self-worth has nothing to do with how attractive you are, what job you have, whether you're single or married. Your value does not decrease on someone's inability to see your worth. Your value doesn't decrease based on what you do or don't have either.

Your value is innate; you are amazing just as you are.

I hope you now have a deeper understanding of why you're suffering from low self-worth and how to empower yourself. You do not need to be a slave to your conditioning. You don't have to remain shackled to people-pleasing and demoralizing ways of living. At your core, you are your own world and free; now you have the tools to reclaim your power and embrace your true self.


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